Passion

This week I have been struck by passion. Not my own passion. Well not at first anyways. This week I have been fortunate enough to be surrounded by the passion of others and I have to say that it has impacted me in unexpected and thoughtful ways.

My wake up to passion started last Thursday when I went to pick up Sadie, my beloved and busy two year old, from her new in-home daycare. As I let myself in through the back door, I was immediately greeted by one of Sadie's little friends whom I had yet to meet. She was a beautiful 3 year old girl with long dark hair, big brown eyes and pink and white striped tights. As I met her smile with my own, Sadie came whipping around the corner with her little fists planted on her hips. "NO!!!," my own daughter shouted to the little girl with pink and white tights, "That is MY MOMMY!!" She looked directly at the girl and for a moment I believe that Sadie contemplated pushing her to the ground. Instead she ran into my arms and gave me a big hug. In that instant, she was all mine. I was all hers. There was nothing else.

OK, so maybe there are some lessons for Sadie to learn (in due time) about sharing, but even with that said, I felt my heart open up wide to my youngest daughter and how fierce her love is. It allowed me to think about my own love for others and this encounter prompted me to ask myself if I let my love for those closest to me to reveal itself so open and wide and without restraint?

My second encounter with the passion of others was also a surprise. Friday night I went out to a local pub to see my husband Matthew and his band, 3 Bean Soup, play. These guys were truly incredible and they played all of their songs with a sense of freshness and aliveness. They were playing a variety of old favorites such as Beatles, U2, and Crosby Stills and Nash. Even though the songs were not new, there was something very current about the way they sounded.

As I watched my husband vibrate with energy as he belted out "You can't always get what you want...," by the Rolling Stones, I thought about how tired he had been earlier in the day from a full work week as a programmer and yoga teacher. I also knew that he had been up in the early hours of the night before with a crying baby and had watched Sesame Street with her at 2am. None of that tiredness or ragged edge was evident as I watched his band play. Even though it was close to midnight, these guys were hitting the mark. They were on fire. The crowd was loving it. They were loving it. Again it struck me. Passion. It is contagious to be in the presence of a person who has it.

Passion is compelling and powerful emotion. It can be the best aspects of the human heart. We all have it. It is just that sometimes we feel cut off from it. Maybe the mundane duties of navigating through the responsibilities of our lives sever our connection to such a depth of feeling. Maybe we are scared to truly unleash our potential, unaccustomed to such fierceness and intensity.

When I was confronted with the passions of those I love, it made me want to wake up my own passion. I felt a glimpse of "awakening" in my own being and wanted to follow that spark. The passion of those around me made me ask my own self, " What am I doing in my life right now to ignite my own internal fire?"

As a yogi, I am always rediscovering and studying what it is like to be a human being. I am sometimes painfully aware that I only inhabit a small part of my life. Aren't we all a little like this? We meander through our life, almost as if asleep, separated from our deepest sources of energy, intelligence or creativity. However, the beauty of the message I received from the discovery of passion in others was that I can re spark my own love for my life at any time. Nobody else can do that for me and I don't need to wait for anyone or anything. I don't need to become a better yoga teacher, lose five pounds or have the laundry complete. I can begin to inhabit my life more fully at any moment and in any situation.

The intense emotion and burning that I saw in others this week was an unexpected gift. It made me go to my yoga with mat with a newness and a sense of inquiry into who I am. I must admit I still do not know the answer. But isn't there beauty in uncertainty?

I do believe it is in these little moments of waking up that brings us to yoga. Yoga begins when we become ready to meet ourselves and claim our lives to the fullest potential. Yoga begins when we set out on our own personal journey to reunite with who we truly are. It doesn't matter if we ever arrive at our imagined destination or find a rainbow ending. All that matters is the journey. We just need to take it.